Pantry Alfredo Sauce

Let's be honest here. I don't truly believe that Alfredo is Alfredo without some cream--usually a lot of cream. Without that, in all honesty, it's really just a white sauce. But this is a very delicious and rich and Alfredo-esquewhite sauce, especially considering we will be using mostly items from our pantry. You can call it diet Alfredo if you want since it uses whole milk instead of actual cream, but then--and I just don't know how to say this politely--you'd kind of be an idiot because this is a whole milk-based cheese sauce with a butter roux. But, you know, whatever makes you and yourn feel good about life.

The real purpose and reason for this recipe is that sometimes you run out of cream. Or milk. Or both. And then you get a hankering for creamy pasta. Wow, life can be really hard sometimes. I mean, wait till our grandchildren hear these stories of deprivation. But I digress. The point is I wanted Alfredo and had no cream. I didn't want to run to the store. And, truly, if one of your New Year's Resolutions involves saving a little money this year, then running to the store every time you want a food is a bad idea. So here you go. Now you can have your Alfredo and eat it too.

This is a super easy recipe that involves shelf-stable foods and takes less than 10 minutes to pull together. Additionally, you get it for less than $2. Hello pasta night. (Note: Butter is often refrigerated, but does not actually need refrigeration--at least in the shortish term. While you probably don't want to leave it out for a year or anything, it'll be good on your counter for several weeks. We leave our butter on the counter all the time so it's easy to butter bread. I'm not truly sure how long it will stay good on the counter, because we go through our counter stick of butter in less than two weeks--usually less than 1 week. But I've never ever in all my 13 years of married life had counter butter go bad.)

Pantry Alfredo Sauce
serves 2-4
Prep and cook time: less than 10 minutes
Cost:$1.80
butter: .25, evaporated milk: .70, cheese: .75, other stuff: .05 (Aldi prices)

1/4 C butter
2 Tbsp flour
1 can whole evaporated milk
1/4-1/2 tsp salt
3/4 C Parmesan cheese (the real stuff, not the powdery kind)
1/4 tsp garlic powder (optional)
the juices from a can of diced tomatoes (optional, but a very very nice touch if I do say so myself)

Melt butter in a pot on medium heat. Whisk in flour. Let cook for 30-60 seconds. Add salt and garlic powder if using and whisk. Whisk in evaporated milk. Keep whisking till it's nice and smooth. Keep stir/whisking every minute or so until it thickens slightly. Now whisk in the cheese (you may want to turn the heat down or take it off the heat entirely here). Stir it for a few minutes until it melts and the entire mixture thickens.

Now I would recommend opening a can of diced tomatoes (we used tomato and basil, but any kind would work.) Pour the liquid from the can into your sauce and whisk it. This makes the sauce a pretty color and just really adds a nice little flavor. Then, I served the remaining tomatoes with my pasta and Alfredo. It was fabulous.

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Fluffer Nutter Dip

A few days ago I made some chocolate tortillas to be served with fruit as fruit tacos. These were met with only moderate success (even with plenty of whipped cream thereby). But me, being me--I didn't really want to throw away the leftover chocolate tortillas. But I didn't really want to slather them in salsa either.

I remembered a dip I'd had once at a church gathering. It was fluffy and peanut-buttery. That seemed like a good place to start. So I looked up fluffer nutter. It is a delightful combination of equal parts peanut butter and marshmallow fluff. Well, I'm pretty sure you can't lose with that combo (unless you're a contestant on The Biggest Loser, in which case you could lose rather easily with that combo).

The problem was that I, being a horrible parent and all, do not keep marshmallow fluff on hand. So I decided to experiment with my own slightly healthier version of fluffer nutter. And by slightly healthier, let me clarify that I do mean slightly. As in "to a small degree; not considerably" healthier. Because that, my friends, is the kind of hard core health fanatic I am. Although--in my defense--I have to say that my attitude is not quite as Epicurean as one blogger, who said that one of the advantages of the original dip (a dip which consists of equal parts peanut butter and marshmallow fluff) was that it would cut the carbs. By which she means, I assume, that she would normally just flop the jar of marshmallow fluff on the table and have at it. Thank goodness we added some peanut butter. Now it's a health food. And I, I--promoter of healthy dips for picky kids--will now take it one step further. I think we should call it a super food.

Instead of marshmallow fluff, I added cream cheese and a little powdered sugar. I might have been proud of that adaptation's healthiness except that it wasn't fluffy enough (or quite sweet enough). So I added whipped cream. (What? it was totally homemade--that qualifies as righteous, right?)

This can be served with real bonifide chocolate tortilla chips by making these tortillas, then cutting them and frying them up (health food fanatic--right here). However, I would have to tell you that this would not be worth the work. It'd be a better bet to serve them with apple slices or chunks of banana. Or--if you are not a health nut (ha--puns and sarcasm) like myself--perhaps some graham crackers or pretzels.

Fluffer Nutter Dip
makes about 3-4 Cups (which is enough for a party and probably too much for your family)
Prep time: 10 minutes
Cost: $4.00
peanut butter: .85, cream cheese: 1.00, powdered sugar: .15, whipped cream: 2.00

1 C peanut butter
8 oz cream cheese
1/2 C powdered sugar
2 C whipped cream (I used the real thing, but I expect nasty Cool Whip would work too--yes, I'm a cream snob)

Cream the peanut butter and cream cheese together. Beat in the powdered sugar.

Add in the whipped cream. If using the real stuff be sure not to overbeat it--just beat until it's blended.

Serve with fruit slices or sweet crackers.

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Caramel Buttermilk Syrup

So I gave you my nice healthy whole wheat and zucchini pancakes. And I mean, sure, you could eat them with some wholesome topping--some fruit sauce or pure maple syrup or maybe a bit of lightly sweetened Greek yogurt. Ooooorrrr.... You could top them with this intensely decadent, slightly wicked caramel buttermilk syrup. You could also top ice cream with this (for reals), but we needn't discuss that right now because we're pretending that this is something acceptable for a breakfast food.

The idea of buttermilk syrup was kind of gross to me at first--if you've ever had a swig of actual buttermilk, you will understand this. It's an acidic, sour tasting milk. But don't worry, in this recipe it's combined with a stick of butter and a couple cups of sugar. Also, you add baking soda, which combines with that acidic milk and works its science-y magic and makes it so there's not a hint of sour anywhere near this syrup.

Also, in order to justify my unwholesome breakfast habits, let me point out that surely this (in some form of moderation should you be able to manage that) surely isn't any worse than pancakes smeared with butter and topped with cheap syrup. So enjoy.

Caramel Buttermilk Syrup
adapted from Creations by Kara
Makes: a few cups
Cook time: 10-ish minutes
Cost: $1.30
buttermilk: .40, sugar: .10, brown sugar: .25, butter: .50, other stuff: .05

Note: Often I substitute milk and vinegar for buttermilk. I'm guessing that will NOT work in this so I don't recommend you try it.
-You know what else I discovered won't work: Lowfat buttermilk. Sorry, guys, but the full fat does better.

Note: Be sure to start the buttermilk off in a cool pan. Once I added it to an already hot pan because I'd been distracted while making this and the pan heated up before I got my ingredients in it. The buttermilk curdled, so start it off cool and heat it from there.

1 1/2 C buttermilk
1 C sugar
1 C brown sugar
1/2 C (1 stick) butter
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp vanilla

In a large saucepan, bring buttermilk, sugars, and butter to a boil over medium heat. When it's boiling, take it off the heat and whisk in the baking soda. it's going to bubble up like crazy, so be sure you have not used a tiny saucepan. Whisk in vanilla (don't forget--it adds a lot).

As this cools the bubbles go away. (Though you don't have to wait for it to cool to serve it--just stir it up and get a nice ladle full.)

According to the original blogger, this will keep for several months in the refrigerator. Unfortunately, we have not be able to put this theory to the test as ours is often gone in two days.

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Hot Honey Vinaigrette

This month for Secret Recipe Club, I had Suzanne from Thru the Bugs on My Windshield (which is an awesome blog title, don't you think). Suzanne used to be the moderator of my Secret Recipe Club group and she was always super helpful, so I was happy to get her this month.

In the spring I always get a hankering for salad. (And ice cream.) But let's pretend for today that I only have good impulses--nice salady impulses. I did, after all, recently purchase a spring mix, a tub of arugula, and a bag of spinach at the grocery store (and Breyer's ice cream). And I'll be darned if I didn't need something great to top it off with (dressing for the salads and Magic Shell for the ice cream, thank you very much). I was especially wanting something good for the arugula. I've been fixing to jump on the arugula bandwagon for a while. If you, like me, are a little behind the times in your greens--arugula is a slightly bitter, peppery green. Now I don't know about you, but when I hear bitter green, I tend to think of those garden greens that have shot up in your garden and are nasty and bitter. Yeah, those are gross (they are also the type of lettuce I'm most skilled at growing in the garden--arg). But arugula is not that kind of bitter. It's got a bite and a peppery taste, but it's not like those nasty bitter greens at all. It's more intentional in flavor--like a green with a strong personality. I found that I really liked it (hello, bandwagon, sorry I'm always so late jumping on). But for a green with a strong personality, I wanted a dressing with a strong personality. Suzanne's vinaigrette was just the thing: a little mustard, a little chile, a little honey. It totally worked. She used it for a Napa cabbage slaw, but it totally rocked my arugula. 

Happy Spring!

Hot Honey Vinaigrette

adapted from Thru the Bugs on My Windshield

Makes about a cup

Prep time: 5 minutes

Cost: $.70

vinegar: .20, olive oil: .30, honey: .10, other stuff (totally estimating here, sorry): .10

Note: Because this uses olive oil, it will sort of harden/set up in the fridge. Thus, you'll want to take it out of the fridge a half hour or so before use so it can "relax." If you find that planning ahead far enough to allow your food to relax is stressful, (hello, dinner in two minutes), run it under some hot water for a minute and that should do the trick. 

1/4 C rice wine vinegar

1/2 C olive oil (extra virgin)

2 Tbsp honey (or agave for a vegan dressing)

1/2 tsp chile powder (Suzanne used green; I used red)

1/4 tsp dry mustard

1/4 tsp salt (I used a tiny bit more)

1/4 tsp black pepper

1/4 tsp garlic powder (I used a bit less)

1/4 tsp onion powder

Add ingredients into a shake proof jar and shake your little heart out until the ingredients combine and seem to slightly thicken (emulsify). 

Or, if you'd like to spare your arm muscles, you can put it in a mini blender or mini food processor and blend/process. (I've done mine both ways.)

You can also put everything into a bowl and whisk, then slowly pour your oil in, whisking as you go. I've never done this since I have a terrible syndrome called "lazy arm"; otherwise known as "person of weak moral fiber syndrome." But don't worry, I'm working through it. 

No matter the method used to combine your dressing, if you have leftover dressing you want to use the next day, you'll likely have to re-shake it (so you may have to seek some treatment for your "super lazy arm" syndrome or perhaps just enlist the help of husband or hapless child).  

PRINTABLE RECIPE

An InLinkz Link-up

Cilantro Cream Sauce for Fish Tacos

So at the end of the year when Kip and I ordered 2 (TWO) years worth of pictures, which came to us in haphazard order, I begged him to add that date feature to our camera. And then when these food bloggy pictures came up, I thought, "Oh yeah." So until I remember to ask my electronic genius of a husband to remove it (because I am electronically remedial), you'll get that lovely date on my pictures. Alas.

But nevermind my photographing and electronic insecurities. Let's talk about fish. Fish is easy and fast. Tacos are easy and fast. It's a heavenly match. I mean, seriously, this is amazing and healthy dinner in less than 15 minutes. But if you top it with something nasticular because you don't know what you're doing, then you will be sad. So top it with something good and still easy.

I came across this little recipe in a cookbook called The Picky Palate, which is great (though not at all, in my humble and rather experienced opinion, at all for picky palates). It's lovely and cooling and simple. We used it over tilapia, but I plan to use the rest this week over shrimp. I think it would work over any basic, mild white fish.

You'll cook your fish first. I did my tilapia for just about 3 minutes a side in a skillet with simple olive oil. Then you add this. You can leave it just fish and sauce in your taco or add shredded cabbage, avocado (which is wicked good with this) slivers of red peppers, or cooked peppers and onions (my choice).

Cilantro Cream Sauce for Fish Tacos
adapted from The Picky Palate
prep time: 3 minutes
Cost: $.40
sour cream: .25, cilantro: .10, other stuff: .05

4 oz sour cream
1/2 C finely chopped cilantro leaves
1/4 tsp hot sauce (or a dash or two of cayenne pepper)
1/4 tsp salt, 1/4 tsp pepper
1/2-1 tsp lime juice

Combine all ingredients. Use as a topping for flaked fish or shrimp.

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Homemade Magic Shell

Magic. Shell.

Come on, children of the '80s, was this not the pinnacle of dessert toppings, the treat of all treats, the magic food of all magic foods?

We had this only rarely on our ice cream and I have the fondest of memories regarding it. Kip is the same way. I haven't seen it around much in recent years. And I haven't gone looking for it. The last thing I figured my children needed on their ice cream was some type of super processed, chemically-filled, crap-tube of fake chocolate, right? Right. Because that is what most store-bought chocolate sauces are. I certainly never tried to re-create it. I was sure that the chemical cocktail that must be Magic Shell could never be reproduced by the simple staples in my very own humble pantry. In fact, Kip and I would occasionally make a ganache-y type ice cream topping and say to each other, "Wouldn't it be cool if it would harden like Magic Shell?" And then laugh sadly because we knew such things could never be in the realm of the home made.

But then I saw a display of Magic Shell at Aldi and it was all of $1.89, so--blaming this winsome purchase on my husband (no, he wasn't there buying it, but that doesn't mean I couldn't blame him for it), I bought it. Naturally everyone was thrilled about it and that old magic was introduced into my children's lives as their chocolate hardened on their ice cream.

And then I looked at the ingredient list. And then I laughed. And then my brain exploded. Because it was the shortest ingredient list I'd ever seen on a store-bought ice cream topping: chocolate, coconut oil, sunflower oil, and maybe one or two other things. And then I had an epiphany--the secret of magic shell: Coconut oil. That magical oil that hardens when cold and is liquid at about 72 degrees (hello, summer household temps). Of course, in the '80s coconut oil was considered Satan's oil, so no one was talking about it, much less owning it. In the '80s you might as well feed your children motor oil as you would have a container of coconut oil sitting on your pantry shelf (because, you know, we were too busy eating nutritious foods like margarine--or better yet--fat-free margarine; yum). But now, now coconut oil is practically the coating for the pearly gates themselves. Now you can go on out and buy you some at Walmart. And, because of this, now you can make your very own magic shell topping.

And it is so easy. So so easy that you might cry for joy. It is so easy that when I tried it I was absolutely positively sure it would not work. But it did. Oh, yes it did.

Check this shell-like magic:

Are you ready for the rocket science that was the envy of all '80s ice cream toppings. Prepare to have your brain explode.

Homemade Magic Shell (ice cream topping)
Prep time: 30 seconds
Cost: $1.00 for about 6 oz.

1 C chocolate chips
1 Tbsp coconut oil

Melt (I did this in the micowave). Stir. Store. Challenging I know. Thirty years of believing in the impenetrable mystique that Magic Shell was and now...

Now you should eat in on your ice cream people. Give it 30-60 seconds to harden up and you're sitting there in retro ice cream heaven.

And, yes, just like store-bought Magic Shell, it stores at room temperature and stays in a liquid state (at least in the summer; if your house is cool in the winter, I don't know that I can guarantee that, but then you'll be wanting warm toppings for your ice cream anyway, right? Yeah, right.)

One important note: If you use high quality coconut oil (as I did--this is the healthiest and I wouldn't want the things I combine with chocolate chips and ice cream to be unhealthy), it will have a very very mild coconut-y overtone. I loved this. However, if you (like my oldest son) do not, you can use a cheaper variety of coconut oil--something that is not extra-virgin, expeller pressed. It still is solid when cold and liquid when at warm-ish room temperature (and it is still better than partially-hydrogenated).

Another note: If you house is cold, you can just warm this a tiny bit in the microwave before serving to get it to its liquid state.

One more note: This lasts for several days, but it does not have the nearly indefinite life its commercial brother does. After a while it will harden and get kind of weird. This only happened once to us with about a Tbsp we'd managed not to consume. It took a week for it to go funky and maybe a short stint in the microwave would have rescued it. I don't know; one of my kids scraped it out with a spoon and ate it.

Avocado Salad Dressing

Now that we've learned how to know when to cut open our avocados, let's talk recipes. I made this last night for a lettuce-based salad. It was delicious. It would also be delicious as a mayo sub for chicken salad. It would also be a fabulous veggie/cracker/whatever dip. It'd be so amazing with hamburgers I might have to make some this week just to have them together. And while it could be spread on your hamburgers, it could also be used as a dip for your fries. Or chips. Or to give your potato salad a little pizzazz. It's just that kind of a thing--a be-whatever-you-need kind of a condiment.

You can use Greek yogurt or sour cream to make it. I'd planned to use Greek yogurt, but them my kids ate it all for lunch, so I used sour cream. To make it more dressing-y, a yogurt would be perfect. To make it more dippy, use sour cream. Although I cannot emphasize enough that you could use either for anything and it will be great.

Avocado Dressing
makes about 1 cup
Prep time: 5 minutes
Cost: $2.00
avocado: 1.00, yogurt: .50, olive oil: .40, other stuff: .10 (this will be considerably cheaper with sale avocados which is what I used--mine were .60 and bulk yogurt--mine only cost about .25 for 1/2 C)

1 avocado, mashed
2 tsp lemon juice
1/2 C Greek yogurt, regular yogurt, or sour cream
1/4 C olive oil (another oil would work as well, but I really like it with olive)
1-2 garlic cloves
3/4 tsp salt
dash of cayenne or hot sauce (optional)

Mash the avocado. Add lemon juice and combine. This should keep it's color nice longer as well as add a nice punchy flavor.

Add other ingredients and mix until it's combined.

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Cilantro Spinach Pesto

I really love classic pesto. I don't often mess around with it. But last night when we had this delicious pork, I had shredded some cilantro onto it, but felt like it really needed something a little saucier to go with. And then the neurons connected in my brain and I made this. Only I didn't have enough cilantro for it to actually blend even in my mini blender. I needed more greens. Blending that cup of spinach into it with more olive oil, I was sure I'd messed it up, but it came out delicious, cilantro-y, and with a bit of nutritional punch. I did not complain.

Cilantro Spinach Pesto
Makes, um, a half cup or so
Prep time: 5 minutes
Cost: $1.10
cilantro: .25, spinach: .30, olive oil: .30, pine nuts: .25

1 C cilantro leaves
1 C spinach leaves
1/3 C olive oil
2 Tbsp pine nuts
1 clove garlic

Blend in small blender or some type of mini food processor. Serve with pork, chicken, rice, or beans.

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Winter Fruit Dip

Today one of my friends had a baby shower. I really really wanted to bring a nice wintery fruit tray. I looked online and found several fruit trays labeled as "winter" which contained berries and melons. This irritated me. Just like it irritates me to go a restaurant in the winter and order a "seasonal vegetable medley" and get zucchini and yellow squash.

Unless you live in, say, Florida, I'm sure you can see the problem with a winter fruit tray as--if we were going to do it true North American style--it would contain cranberries and perhaps some old apples you've been keeping in the cellar. Yum. Even if you're willing to push the definition of winter fruit and call upon our Californian/Floridian neighbors for a little help, you're going to wind up with orange slices, apples (going to brown), pears (going to brown), and maybe a pineapple or some pomegranate seeds. You could also use dry fruit and nuts, which I did think was a nice idea--especially mingled in a tray with real fruit--but it can also be a very expensive idea.

So I settled on an average-ish fruit tray.

But I did find a great dip. It's tasty, simple, and sort of healthyish.

Even if you already have your favorite fruit dip, you can "winterize" it by grating in a bit of orange rind. It's pretty and adds a nice flavor and gives it that wintery something special. (Garnish it with a few pomegranate seeds if you really want to be belle of the ball, but I was running late, which must be why I am never ever the belle of the ball.)


Winter Fruit Dip
Makes about 3 C
Prep time: 5 minutes
Cost: $2.00
yogurt: 1.10, whipped cream: .60, sugar: .15, orange for rind: .15)

2 C yogurt (I used whole fat. Greek would be best, but normal worked too)
1 C whipped cream (this can be homemade or Cool Whip if you want to cheat--I did homemade)
1/2 C powdered sugar (or to taste)
1 tsp grated orange rind

Mix it all together. I cut out half a pineapple and served it in that, which was kind of fun, and easy enough for those of us with cuteness impairments. Add a few more grates of orange to the top if you've got the time for garnish.

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Homemade Nutella

Oh. Wow. Maybe this is circulating on the Internet right now; I don't know; I don't care. You should have this recipe and you should make it. And--truth be told--it's actually way more virtuous than most of the edible gifts being passed around these days (being larger parts nuts and cocoa than sugar, although, yes, sugar does herein exist). Many thanks to A Southern Fairytale for introducing it to me.

It's just incredible and it can be gluten free. It tastes amazing. And it's quick and easy to make. It is not intensely cheap, although I intend to experiment with some cheaper nuts and give this to friends and teachers next Christmas.

Every year I give Kip a jar of Nutella in his stocking. I also try to make a homemade gift or two. This kind of kills two birds with one stone for me. Now if I can just keep it a secret a few days longer.

One note on this: I had to order the hazelnuts online and they weren't cheap. If you can find them locally, they'll probably be more affordable. However, after making this, I'm sure it would be devilishly good with peanuts, almonds, or probably any other nut that you like. 

Oh, and to answer the big question that you all must be asking: Does it actually taste like Nutella? Well, yes and no. The flavor is very similar to Nutella. It's a little hazelnuttier, which IMHO is nothing but an endorsement. However, the texture is a little less smooth (at least when made with my food processor), just so you know--more similar to the texture of a natural peanut butter (though not quite so thick) than the incredibly smooth jarred Nutella.

Homemade Nutella
adapted from A Southern Fairytale
Makes about 2 Cups
Prep time: 10 minutes
Cost: $8.60
(hazelnuts: 7.00, coconut oil: 1.00, cocoa: .25, sugar: .35)

2 C toasted hazelnuts, peeled
1/2 C coconut oil, melted
1 C powdered sugar
1/2 C unsweetened cocoa powder
1 1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1/4 tsp salt

Put hazelnuts in food processor or high-powered blender. Process until they form a paste. Add remaining ingredients and process. Scrape down the sides as needed and just keep blending until it's as smooth as possible.

I put this in mason jars to give away. Supposedly it lasts two weeks. I'm giving Kip a day and a half top.

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Basil Balsamic Vinaigrette

This month for Secret Recipe Club, I was given Join Us, Pull Up a Chair. Heather began her blog as a way to keep track of her recipes, and then it grew. She's got some great food up. In fact, when I went there just now to link up, I wanted to make all three of the first recipes that came up (Spinach artichoke chicken casserole--yum).

The one I did make was a simple, yet slightly unusual salad dressing. My basil and tomatoes are at their scrawny end and it seemed a nice way to bid the season adieu. In this dressing, Heather uses fresh basil and white balsamic vinegar. I'd never heard of white balsamic vinegar and didn't have it (and I'm guessing it'd be tough to find in my town). A quick internet search said that regular balsamic or white wine vinegar could be substituted. I used regular balsamic and was pleased. The flavor of the vinegar was stronger than usual in a salad dressing; and the sweet, warm-toned balsamic seemed the perfect flavor for a fall salad. If you used the white wine vinegar, I'm guessing you'd have a milder dressing, but the basil would shine through more. Both are win win. And if you can find the white balsamic, then it's probably a triple win for you.

Basil Balsamic Vinaigrette
adapted from Join Us, Pull Up a Chair
Prep time: 3 minutes
Cost: $2.00
basil (free for me, but probably .50-1.00), oil: 1.00, vinegar: .05

1/3 C balsamic vinegar (or white balsamic or white wine)
1 C olive oil
1 C basil leaves, packed
1 tsp sea salt
1 tsp sugar

Note: I made a very small amount of this--I quartered the recipe (did I mention my basil was on its way out). Consequently, I skipped the food processor and just chopped my basil very small and then shook my dressing most vigorously. Worked great if you just want to make a bit.

Combine all ingredients in food processor and give it a whirl.

Serve over salad (do I even need to tell you how great this is with tomatoes?). I bet it'd kick butt on chicken or fish too.

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Smoked Paprika Fry Sauce

(it's not quite this pink; I don't know how people take pictures of things in the red family)

In The Netherlands, they serve their fries with mayonnaise. Don't ask me why--maybe the mayonnaise there is different--but it's so so amazing on fries. I still like some good home fries with mayo. 

In Utah, they serve their fries with "fry sauce," which is basically ketchup and mayonnaise mixed together into an admittedly amazing condimental concoction. 

Here in this house, we serve our fries with--well, we serve them with ketchup most of the time because some of the inhabitants of this house would snort ketchup straight into their blood streams if they could figure out how. But--please prepare for a gasp-worthy confession--ketchup gets kind of boring to me. I can't even feel all self-righteous and diss on it for its high fructose corn syrup levels or sodium or any other of its less than virtuous health qualities. It's not even that I don't like it. I do, really. It allowed me to eat eggs for years as a child when I otherwise would have just gagged them onto the floor. It's just that I, well I just...I just sometimes need a little change. Please don't tell Kip. He might leave me for the ketchup lady at McDonald's or something.  

Lately this has been my own little addiction. I don't even know why. It's just got a little undertone of tang with a little undertone of garlic and smokiness. The flavors are all subtle and just fit really nicely together. And, what can I say, I've fallen for it. The first time I tried it, I was like, "Hmmm, good." But I didn't think it would keep calling to me like it did. But then the next day I found myself wanting to make something potato just to be able to use it again and then the day after that I was scooping fry fulls of it into my mouth and slathering it on my meat as well. Right now as I write this I'm dreaming of these home fries all drizzled in this sauce and salivating as I type. And--could someone please tell me that's normal, because there's only so much you can do before you have to accept that you have a problem. 

Paprika Fry Sauce

adapted from Everyday Food

Makes a little over 1/4 C

Prep time: 2 minutes

Cost: $.15

mayo: .10, other stuff: .05

Note: Smoked paprika is my new BFF. It is nothing like it's ho-hum cousin. Well, it is that gorgeous color of red still, but it's got the personality to match its looks. I've been hearing about it forever and finally tried it. If you feel a little intimidated and don't know where to find it, don't worry--McCormick makes a version and theirs is pretty good. 

1/4 C mayonnaise

2 Tbsp lemon juice

1 garlic clove, minced

3/4 tsp smoked paprika

Combine all ingredients. 

Note: This is good the first day, but better after the flavors have melded for a day (or probably even just a few hours). 

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Homemade Pumpkin Pie Spice

Cheap Eat Challenge, Part 2: Watch as our family of 6 eats on less than $10/day.

Lately, I've come across a bunch of recipes that call for pumpkin pie spice. It's not a crazy expensive spice to buy, although it's still cheaper to make because it's comprised muchly of cinnamon, which can be bought for very cheap. However, I've found that it's nice to have a recipe for this on hand for those times you find a recipe that calls for it and you don't have it. Not that things like that ever happen to me. Because I have a perfectly stocked pantry, especially if I'm making something in a time crunch. Yes, I am definitely always prepared at those times. But just in case you're not...

Homemade Pumpkin Pie Spice

Makes 6-7 tsp

Prep time: 1 minute

Cost: I really have no idea, but I'm going to go out on a limb here and say $.05

4 tsp cinnamon

1 tsp nutmeg

1 tsp ginger

1/2 tsp cloves

generous dash allspice (optional and I usually leave it out, but if you're an allspice lover, you'll want to throw some in)

Mix all ingredients together. 

Then use as directed in your recipes

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Poor Man's Pesto (Also, it's nut free)

Cheap Eat Challenge, Part 2: Watch as our family of 6 eats on less than $10/day.

Anybody priced out pine nuts lately? They've never been what we here like to call cheap, but this year they are what we here like to call really outrageous. Earlier in the summer when I made pesto, I used the remainder of a big bag I bought last summer and and stored in the freezer. This time around, I kept looking at different stores thinking that the last store with its crazy expensive pine nuts must have been a fluke. (In some circles, this is called denial.) After about 5 stores of this, I put some expensive ones in my basket. Then on my way to the checkout, I walked past some sunflower seeds. They had a bright yellow and red sale sign. That always catches my eye.

The sunflower seeds cost 1/4 of what the cheapest pine nuts cost. And I thought, "What the heck; they're kind of sort of in the same kind of sort of family, right. And they've kind of sort of got the same kind of sort of look and texture, right?" That was good enough for me.

My Poor Man's Pesto turned out pretty good too. Let me level with you; it wasn't quite as good as Classic Pesto (aka that with pine nuts). I'm a huge pine nut aficionado. Plus, the sunflower seeds I bought were pre-roasted; I think raw would have been better and more like a pine nut in that oily, toothsome texture they have. However, this pesto is awesome, and while I don't know how it will measure up with classic pesto in pasta, I think it might be even better on sandwiches and meat than classic pesto. It's nuttier, and I like that in a seed.

P.S. This is also nut free, so it's great for anyone with allergies who wants to enjoy some pesto.

Poor Man's Pesto
makes 1-2 C
Prep time: 10 minutes; maybe a little more if you need to clean your basil well, as I did
Cost: $.75
(my basil was free; sunflower seeds: .50, olive oil: .20, garlic: .05)

4 C basil leaves, well washed
1/2 C olive oil
1/2 C sunflower seeds (if wanting for sandwiches, this is perfect; if you want it in pasta sauces, I'd reduce it to 1/4 C or 1/3 C)
6-8 large cloves garlic
salt if your sunflower seeds are raw; otherwise omit

Put all ingredients in a blender or food processor and blend until smooth.

Not having pesto tonight? Put the remainder in ice cube trays, freeze, and then store in a freezer bag.

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Orange Vinaigrette

Cheap Challenge, Part 2: Watch as our family of 6 eats on less than $10/day.

I like to believe that my body is fully in tune with the seasons and the cosmos and that is why I suddenly start craving greens in the spring and fall, but maybe I just have a folate deficiency.

Seriously, though, every spring and every fall I get a major hankering for salad--not the tomato cucumber salads of summer and not any other kind of funky or gourmet type salad--just a regular old bowl of any mix of greens, maybe with some other vegetables thrown on. I'm sure it doesn't hurt that this tends to be a season of excess and a little something light sounds really nice most nights.

One of the great things about getting that urge when oranges are on or coming on is that you can make this dressing. I've had it in my to-try list for over a year. Oh, the sweet citrus-y salads I've been missing in that time. As of yesterday, this has become my go to.

Orange Vinaigrette
Prep time: 3 minutes
Cost: $.95
sugar: .10, orange juice: .64 (the cost of an orange right now; that'll go down soon); vinegar: .02, oil: .16, dressing: .03

1/2 C sugar
1/3 C orange juice
1/2 C rice wine vinegar
1 C canola oil (olive would work too, but will add a distinct taste to your dressing; I liked the canola because it didn't get in the way of the orange)
2 Tbsp dry Italian dressing

Shake it up in a glass jar and let it stand for 30 minutes. (Bad things probably won't happen if you don't let it stand, but it lets the flavors get better acquainted.)

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Taco Seasoning

Cheap Eat Challenge, Part 2: Watch as our family of 6 eats on less than $10/day.

Spices aren't always cheap (although those huge ones at Sam's Club do make life a little easier on your wallet). But spices are our friends and we accept them as they are. However, those seasoning packets--they are not our friend (well, usually) and we need not accept them as they are. First of all, they're pricey--way more pricey than their plain spice brothers. Secondly, seasoning packets tend to be full of other stuff--stuff that is not spice, but chemincal otherness. Chemical otherness is not our friend. 

Speaking of both friends and chemical otherness: I have a friend with celiac disease. Several weeks ago she had a reaction from some food she ate. The culprit? Taco seasoning. Turns out it can have all kinds of funky stuff in it, including (sometimes) gluten. And other stuff too. Online I found the ingredient list for Old El Paso Taco seasoning. It doesn't have gluten. But the first ingredient? Chili? Onion? Peppers? Um, try maltodextrin. This is Old El Paso's list: Maltodextrin, salt, chili pepper, onion powder, spice, monosodium glutamate, corn starch, yellow corn flour, partially hydrogenated soybean oil, silicon dioxide (anticaking agent), natural flavor, ethoxyquin (preservative).

But wait, you don't have celiac disease and you find those packets so wonderfully convenient and you're sick and tired of my lame-o preaching. Um, sorry, I'm a mother of four and can't help myself. And yes, I realize that seasoning packets are very convenient. And time is money, right? Yes, right. But time is what you don't have to spend a lot of to make your own seasoning blends. It takes approximately 3 minutes. That's faster than you'll read through the ingredient list on one of those store-bought packets. Besides, I'm not saying you have to do it all the time. Although after you do it once, you might find that you want to do it all the time. It's super easy. It's super cheap. And you can customize your blends to your family's tastes. Furthermore you can make a lot in one swoop and then have all the seasoning "packets" you need for the next several months. Give it a try and see if you don't convert.

Taco Seasoning

adapted from allrecipes

Prep time: 2 minutes

Cost: $.10

1 Tbsp chili powder

1/4 tsp garlic powder

1/4 tsp onion powder

1/4 tsp crushed red pepper flakes

1/2 tsp paprika

1 1/2 tsp ground cumin

1/2 tsp salt

1 tsp black pepper

Mix everything up and store in an airtight container. 

Stir 2-3 Tbsp into 1 lb beef (depending on how strong you like your taco seasonings; we're a little weak around here).

PRINTABLE RECIPE

• 
  

I like to store mine in old baby food jars. Because I am a person of class and refinement.

Italian Dressing Mix

Cheap Eat Challenge: Watch as our family of 6 eats, or tries to, on $6/day.

Recently, I got a crock pot recipe from my brother that called for a package of dry Italian dressing. I didn't have one, so with the help of the handy internet, I created one. It's really really good, albeit a little salty. Thus I'm going to give a range for the salt. You'll probably want to start off at the lower end. Remember, you can always add more, but you can't take it away.

I used this in my crock pot recipe. It was great. And then a made a salad dressing with it, which was so much more vibrant and soul-full than store bought dressings.

Italian Dressing Mix
adapted from food.com
Prep time: 3 minutes
Cost: Truly--I don't know. The salt and sugar are less than a cent. I'd figure a cent or 2 for each other ingredient (if you buy cheap-ish seasonings like me), but I'm not sure how completely accurate that is.

1 1/2 tsp garlic powder (I scaled this back to about 1 1/4 tsp)
1 Tbsp onion powder
2 Tbsp dried oregano
1 Tbsp dried parsley
1 Tbsp granulated sugar
1-2 Tbsp salt (I'd go 1)
1 tsp black pepper
1 tsp ground basil
1/4 tsp celery salt

Put all ingredients in an air-tight container and give it a good shake. Be sure to give it a good shake or stir before each use because the granular things tend to settle at the bottom while the dried leafy things hang out at the top.

To make dressing: Mix 2 Tbsp of this with 1/4 C vinegar, 2 Tbsp water, and 1/2 C olive or canola oil (I used canola). Put it in a container with a tight lid and shake the heck out of it to combine ingredients. If you want a creamy Italian, add several tablespoons (start with 2) mayo, sour cream, or yogurt (I haven't tried the yogurt, but I think it'd work just fine).

PRINTABLE RECIPE

Note: If you'd like to make this with fresh herbs, you can, though of course, it won't store like the dried recipe will. You'll want to make it into a dressing that you store in the fridge. Generally speaking you use double the fresh herb that you do the dried, though that would give you a lot of dressing, so you might want to scale the recipe back. It would look something like this (warning: I haven't tried this, so you may have to adjust the flavors slightly): 1 clove garlic, crushed; 1 Tbsp onion, mashed; 1 tsp oregano, chopped, 1/2 tsp parsley, chopped, 1 tsp sugar, 1/2 tsp salt, dash pepper, 1/4-1/2 tsp basil, chopped, dash celery salt. Combine in vinegar, oil, and water as instructed above.

Lemon Pepper Dressing (with Bacon and Egg Salad)

Cheap Eat Challenge: Watch as our family of 6 works really hard to eat well on $6/day.

Got hard-boiled eggs? Yeah, me too. Mine have lots of multi-colored splotches on them when you crack them. Yippee. Now what to do with these beauties? I made some deviled eggs, of course. And I think they're great sliced onto a roll sandwich with cheddar, mayo, salt, and pepper. But I've got a booty-load of lettuce in my fridge right now and some expiring spinach. And then my friend mentioned how her mother's been eating egg bacon salads for lunch every day. And all the sudden nothing sounded better in the whole wide world.

And the dressing to go with. Oh, this one's good. I thought I would want to make it creamier with some mayonnaise or sour cream, but found that it had a sort of creaminess even without those things (vegans rejoice). I think this comes from the fact that's it's not quite as thin and unobtrusive as a vinaigrette and also that it sort of jams with the egg yolks (vegans stop rejoicing--but wait vegans, it's still really good; don't go away yet).

And the price tag that goes with it is lovely too. Store-bought salad dressing is rather pricey. Additionally, there are very few varieties that taste really good to me (and those are more than 'rather' pricey). The ingredient lists are nothing short of reprehensible and call me an alarmist (or, you know, whatever else you'd like to call me), but I bet they sometimes sneak MSG in under the 'spices' category. This dressing isn't quite sainted, but it contains friendly fats and simple spices.

For one serving of salad I use 1-2 C interesting lettuce (I use a combination, but anything not iceberg should do), 1 C spinach, 1 hard-boiled egg, and 1-2 strips bacon, crumbled (did I just lose the remaining vegans there). Sometimes I add a sprinkle of cheese too.

Lemon Pepper Dressing

adapted from smittenkitchen

Makes 1 1/2 C

Prep time: less than 5 minutes

Cost: .37

(canola: .12, olive oil: .15, other stuff: .10)

Note: This is good if you mix it up right before you eat it, but it's better if it has some time to sit and let the flavors meld.

Another note: I used dry mustard, which is surprisingly non-obtrusive (at least my el cheapo kind was), which I liked. If you don't have dry mustard, you can sub in regular mustard, but I'd start with only 1/2 tsp. lest the mustard flavor overpower the others.

3/4 C canola oil

1/4 C extra-virgin olive oil

1/4 C red wine vinegar (I suspect another kind would work as well)

2 Tbsp lemon juice

1/2-1 tsp lemon pepper (start with 1/2 and move up if you feel it needs it--I like more)

1 tsp dry mustard

1/2 tsp Worcestershire

1/2 tsp sugar

1 clove minced garlic (or 1/2 tsp garlic powder if you or yourn have texture issues)

1/2-1 tsp salt

1/4-1/2 tsp pepper

Combine all in a jar or a Tupperware with a nice tight lid and shake shake shake it.

Taste it and adjust seasonings.

Let it sit for a spell if you've got the time. And be careful that your lettuce isn't too wet because it dilutes the flavor of this dressing considerably.

Refrigerate to store (that's probably not even necessary if you're going to use it quickly, but it's what I do). Give it a good shake before next use.

PRINTABLE RECIPE

P.S. If you're quacky for all things lemon, as I am, check this out.

Garlic Mustard Vinaigrette

Cheap Eat Challenge: Watch as our family of 6 tries to eat on $6/day.

Guess who's never spelled vinaigrette before today? In fact, now that I'm aware of its proper spelling I believe I've been saying it incorrectly as well. No wonder I don't get invited to fancy dinner parties. I'd surely be wandering about in last year's (if I'm lucky) fashions chatting up that there vinegar-ette. But no more. Now I am a changed woman. Now I will wander about in last year's (fine, it's more like 6 year's ago) fashions discussing lovely vinaigrettes--a word that rolls off the tongue in a way that is properly French. So invite me to your dinner parties, okay. I promise not to use a toothpick to pick my teeth.

Garlic Mustard Vinaigrette
adapted from The New Best Recipe
Serves: 4
Prep time: 3 minutes
Cost: 10 cents-ish

Note: Best Recipe recommends this for bitter salad greens (endive, chicory, dandelion greens, etc., but I think it works with anything)

2 Tbsp olive oil
1 Tbsp sour cream (yogurt would probably work too)
1 1/2 tsp clear vinegar (white wine or plain old distilled or whatever, but not balsalmic or red or something like that)
1 tsp mustard (the fancier the better, but even the dull, cheap stuff words)
1/4 tsp garlic powder or 1 garlic clove, mashed into a puree
salt and pepper to taste

Place all ingredients in a jar or tightly sealed tupperware container and shake the shadingdang out of it. (You see, this is why I still will not be invited to fancy dinner parties--what I meant to say was 'shake vigorously until emulsified.') Emulsified, if you too have been missing out on the fancy dinner parties, means that it's all mixed together and the oil is no longer separate from the rest of the stuff.

Pour onto your salad. It should just coat the leaves of the lettuce rather than be thick and, you know, Ranch-dressing-y.

Any unused vinaigrette can be stored in the refrigerator. Just be sure to give it a good shake before you use it again to re-emulsify the things that have separated.

PRINTABLE RECIPE

A Word on White Sauce

Cheap Eat Challenge: Watch as our family of 6 tries (sigh) to eat on $6/day.

Once upon a time my mother-in-law made macaroni and cheese. It was an excellent recipe, which I hope to soon share with you. It contained macaroni, ground beef, tomatoes, cheese, and some mystical and delicious sauce.

I was newly married and eager to expand my recipe box, so I asked her for the recipe.

"Well, you make the macaroni and then you start off with a basic white sauce..."

Oh dear, she'd already lost me. I got the macaroni part, but had to ask her to tell me how to make a white sauce. She looked at me kind of funny. Clearly, there was a home ec class or two that I should have signed up for. Or maybe I should have drilled my mom a little more about how to cook. Not that anything that started with something containing (no, not containing--being) a fat would have made it past my no fat alert in high school anyway.

So my mother-in-law gave me a brief tutorial on how to make a basic white sauce.

I pass it on to you, with several tips about how to use such powerful wisdom and why it is both cheapskate and cook's best friend.

First, what's it good for.

It's good for soups, casseroles, pasta sauces. It's good for anything in which you otherwise might toss a can of cream of somethingorother soup. At it's homiest, it's the basis for a simple broccoli chicken casserole. Dressed up for the evening, it's the basis of an alfredo sauce.

Secondly, why do cooks love it?

*It tastes better than canned soups, for one thing.
*It has less preservatives and you know just what's inside of it.
*Along that vein, you can season it in a multitude of ways. You can go from basic salt and pepper to onion and garlic to thai or indian.

Thirdly, why do cheapskates love it?

*A can of cream of somethingorothersoup is going to run you about $1.00 and more if you want a name brand soup. The same amount of white sauce costs about $.30.

But isn't it just easier to throw in a can of cream of somethingorother soup? Maybe. This sauce takes 3 minutes to make. Three. Minutes. It often takes me longer than that to find my can opener (true, though unfortunate, story).

A few final notes:

1. You can make this thin for pouring over vegetables or starting a soup. Or you can make it thick (ala cream of somethingorother soup) for casseroles and scalloped foods. (This tip is from my friend, Sally--maker of amazing soup and sometimes-cheapskate extraordinaire.) The thick recipe is given below. To thin it, use half as much butter and flour.
2. You can make a white sauce with milk, but you can also substitute chicken broth (or another broth) if you'd like something to have a thick sauce, but not to be milky or creamy.
3. You can even make it lower fat by using skim milk. I'm not advocating this by any means, but it is certainly possible.
4. You can add cheese and make cheese sauces (see how below). My mom used to pour a cheddar sauce over broccoli when I was a kid and it was the only way I really liked broccoli. So, here's to you, white sauce, for keeping me from a life of vegetable dereliction.

Basic White Sauce
Prep and cook time: 3 minutes
Cost: $.30
(butter: .15, flour: .01, milk: .19)

2 Tbsp butter of other fat (oil, lard, whatever floats your boat)
2 Tbsp flour
1 C milk (or broth)
a few dashes of salt and pepper or whatever crazy seasonings you'd like

Melt butter in saucepan over lowish heat. Whisk in flour (I use a flat whisk) and seasonings. It'll get thick and pasty. Then pour in the milk or broth, stirring as you do. Heat to boiling and let it boil gently for about a minute or until it thickens.

To Make Cheese Sauce: Stir in 1/2 C shredded cheese and 1/4 tsp dry mustard if you've got it on hand and you're feeling fiesty (it won't make it mustard-y tasting; it will just make it good--you can thank Sally for this tip too). Stir until smooth over low heat.

PRINTABLE RECIPE